Author • Similoluwa Ifedayo

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"Ten friends can't play together for ten years"

Yeah, life proves the above quote over the years but I thought friendship is meant to be endless and it is also meant to keep growing stronger and inseparable as the year goes by. It even becomes more stronger when you find both love and friendship in one person. Some people say it is like butterflies in the stomach but Ric Hassani, one of Nigeria's great talent, said that love is more than butterflies in the belly. That whichever way, love is beautiful and friendship is amazing.

Some things are just not meant to be forced, no matter what: one of which is friendship. Teresa is an amazing girl and she cherishes her friends, classmates, family and relationships at large. She tries to make things work and her persistence has somehow made her a warrior because she never gives up. She loves playing with her friends while in primary school. The love was very strong, they dance, sing, act, play games, eat, party and do almost everything together until the day they parted ways to pursue their dreams.

Some of them had plans to go to the same schools but it didn't work out as planned. Teresa remembered and missed her friends for 6 years while in high school and she always wished she could meet them and they would automatically become as close as they were years before, but she was unaware of the fact that things couldn't just work out that way. Teresa as a warrior never gave up the search for her friends on the internet and finally she got in touch with some of them and a group was created so as to catch up and have fun.

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   Teresa was so happy that she looked at the pictures of her classmates who became her friends and she smiled. Her happiness knew no measure and she said "At last, I have missed you guys". The group chat was so interesting for the first few days before attitudes became significant and she noticed the change in character but of course people change over the years so she was less worried. She posted pictures showing their primary school life. Some people loved it but some people insulted it. She wasn't so happy because the pictures were memories that kept her praying for her friends over the years.

         Lest I forget, Teresa is a very patient girl and she believes so much in change. Teresa tried to work things out with her classmates. She tried to bring them together but they were totally different from the person she had become. One of her best male friend had become really proud and paid less regard to anybody. In fact, he left the group chat angrily after a little misunderstanding.

         Teresa after so much trials, words, view, review realised that change is constant even when it comes to friendship. Everyone had become so different, had different friends, achievement and nobody was really ready to start from the scratch of friendship. She was hurt but it's fine cos she got to understand it is okay to let go of the past. 

         Friendship shouldn't be forced neither imposed. Friends are needed to grow but can also be a factor that pushes you down. When people leave and don't care, don't force them to be yours. You can't respect anybody without respecting yourself. Sometimes in life people tend to forget themselves in the bid to impress someone which isn't good. Love is God and love is for everyone. Friendship built on the foundation of love is strong but the bitter truth is love isn't the only factor that hold a relationship such as friendship together. Factors like trust, mutual understanding, good sense of humour, good communication skills, respect, humility, compassion, good listening ears, patience, etc is also very vital for a relationship to stand firmly.

         People say "Show me your friend and I will tell you who you are". The friends you keep are a reflection of who you are. It's okay to make an understanding of their place in your life and it's very wise of you to understand when people show you your place in their lives. Friends shape you and that is why some people should simply be regarded as colleagues, classmates, acquaintance, roommates because your friend is like a mirror. Your friend reflects who you are.

   So, what it seems like at the beginning is not what it becomes at the end. Every relationships has faults and it can be mended but not all relationships should be mended for the safety of one's mental health. Sometimes you have to let go. Relationships aren't supposed to hurt you to the extent of making you feel less of yourself. It is okay to have misunderstandings but misunderstandings is not an excuse for insults.

    Learn not to accept less in a relationship, make your rights known, exercise your rights and respect yourself. In everything you do LOVE YOURSELF.

Photo : Prathma Rastogi - Medium

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