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Author  Oche Maria Faustina

image of the biological representation of parasite


The Parasites are always fleshy and fresh…lol. Back then, in primary and secondary schools, we were taught in Biology {secondary} and Basic Science {primary} something related to parasites and the Host; you can call it the parasitic relationship. The parasite lives and feeds on the host while contributing nothing useful to it. Instead, it contributes germs and disease to it, and this is simply known or called a symbiotic relationship. While the parasite is sucking and drying up the nutrients and energy of the host, the host is often looking sick. Some of us humans are no more than these parasites. We are just like them, if not worse.

We live on the energy and strength of others, but add nothing tangible to their lives. We are constantly sucking, taking and drying them up, and when we are done, we leave them to themselves, broken in most cases. It is in human nature to only go close to a person when there is a guarantee of benefits, and after we get what we want, we retreat and act like we do not know them or they do not exist. And we go back when we are in need again, and we become all sweet and romantic to them.

It is a nasty habit, and you need to stop it if you know you do it. People who show love and care or give us things are not dumb, and we must not treat them sweet only when we need them. Do not just be a person who calls or reaches out when help is needed, and after the support is granted, you run off. I would not answer you if I could help, and I realise you are like that.

Do you remember the one{s} who helped you and do you stay in touch regularly at least? Some of us are even worse than parasites. We leave the host when we realise we have milked and dried them up, and there is nothing beneficial anymore. And the funny thing is, some of us will go back and give flimsy excuses after realising we are getting back on our feet again.

image of many hands reaching out

It is only sensible to reciprocate the feeling when a person loves and shows you care, and no one will hold you in contempt if you [are not simply interested = are not interested -OR- are simply not interested]. It is better than using people and wasting their time. Do you know what it feels like to be treated as a second option? Would you like to be treated like one? Well, I leave you to answer the question, but I believe the answer will be a NO. It is essential to treat people the way we want to be treated. Even the Bible in Matthew 7:12 talks about this. We can simply summarise it as doing unto others what you want to do. It is known as the Golden rule in the Bible. I am not sure about what other religions or faith preach about this, but it might not be very different.

But we must know that treating others with love and respect does not mean they will treat us with same. It is a hard pill to swallow, especially when you have invested so much into them or you love them and can go out of your way for them. When you love a person and have done all you can just to be accepted and it still does not work, you should move away for your good, especially for your mental health. I mention mental health because I have been there. It would affect you negatively and sometimes you think and worry so much about what it is you have done wrong.

We all must come to terms with the fact that humans will always be humans and will always associate or form relationships with people that are beneficial to them. It is human nature and we must agree and make peace with it. A theory in Social Psychology known as Social Exchange Theory explains so much about the reasons we form and sustain relationships. According to the theory, we form relationships based on benefits. We relate with a person because we are getting something, or there is every possibility of getting something from them, and they, on the other hand, also or might hope or have the hope of getting something in return. This is quite relatable to some romantic relationships; a girl wants to be provided for and most times financially and she sees a guy who is wealthy and well to do and the guy, on the other hand, wants sexual pleasure, and they both come together. And sometimes, it could be the guy wanting to be provided for and dating a lady who is wealthy. This simply explains the theory.

It is not just a theory; it is what happens in our real world. We live in a world where most relationships are parasitic relationships. We all are guilty. There must have been, or there is, that person we are close to due to what we intend to gain. Because this is human nature, we mustn’t allow it to control and consume us.

Of course, there is that person we want to gain something from. Still, we should not allow it to be the central point of all or most of the relationships we form. When this happens, there is every possibility of the relationship going into extinction. People will feel bad when they realise a person has been with them only because of the benefits. Work for what you want instead of forming relationships or depending on people just for gains.

Parasitic or symbiotic relationships always hurt the host. Do not just be with people due to your selfish gains. Form real, meaningful and lifelong bonds. Your friends might not always have so much from the beginning, but time tells. Change or reduce your parasitic nature and things will work better for you. CHEERS.


Readersketch | ed. Dolapo Daramola
© 2022 Bakhita - Oche Maria Faustina. All Rights Reserved.

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