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Similoluwa Ifedayo
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"Never stop smiling, Happiness is a choice."

This, running through my mind as I struggle to smile. Sometimes in life we all get to a stage when we think and automatically have a review of what we have, and what we haven't achieved. 

Wide thoughts going through my mind as I think about the things I planned on achieving this time last year but going through a review I haven't achieved most of it; including one of the most important on my list which is my admission into the university.

I'm grateful for life and everything that surrounds me. It hurts deeply seeing some changes in my life and seeing the level of effect it has on me. Calculating the year I planned on gaining an admission into the university and where I am now; yet to gain admission😔. Now it's time to use emojis to express myself 😭. I'm pained😪. I believe so much in a lot of things which includes my country. I believe man proposes, God disposes- the reality of life. It's not about how far but how well. Like a friend wrote and I quote "It's not about how long, I'm here to have a good time. It's about what we make of it." 

I have a lot of wishes like I wish I took my dancing skills more seriously probably I would have been a great dancer. I wish I have a lot of money to help my Instagram account probably going into fashion blogging. I have a lot of wishes. Now no more wishes it's time for action. I want to take my writing skills more seriously and make it. I want to study harder for my jamb so as to gain admission into the university as a law student. This reminds me of what a teacher once told me when I was asked which university I want to attend and I said Harvard University. My teacher laughed and told me "Harvard University 😅. How possible? Only if your dad sells all his properties, and even at that, can it sum up to the tuition fee?" I was hurt and pained but I knew something within me which was you can be whatever you want to be and I told myself even if I can't have my university education there I can have my masters there. Now stories are leading to one another from my fear to my determination. This is what writing does to me, it gives me hope and joy. Now this is something I want to tell myself and everyone that reads this: Live your life with the view of the future. Be realistic with yourself and with your dreams. Don't be too hard on yourself. 

I always ask myself this question; Will you be happy with what you become or have achieved in years to come? You have no excuse for failure instead you will have regrets. When I fall I rise knowing fully well that I have a chance of making my fall a lesson. Who are you going to blame for not becoming established? Who are you going to blame for not achieving all your dreams? The government? Your family background? The school you attended? The environment you lived? The friends you have? What are you going to tell your children or anybody that cares to know? Now you read, understand and utilize. 

Ideas rules the world. You can be whatever you want to be irrespective of your country situation. Even in that your so called bad country a lot of people are becoming successful because they only converted the bad things happening in the country to good things for them. 

Now, my mind is a little bit settled and indeed my mind plays tricks on me. You can regard me as a broad minded person. In years to come I want to read this article and piece of my mind. I want to tell myself that "Hey girl! I hope you are happy with your life now. I hope you have achieved all you want to achieve. I hope you are doing well and you are already a law student or a graduate of law. I hope you are already having your masters in Harvard or still saving up with the strong determination to have your masters. I hope you are a greater writer and have met a lot of great people." Oh my God, I have a lot of things I will tell myself. 

I will write again then and compare and contrast. I hope I am happy comparing. I do not plan to post this now but if I eventually post this. I have something to tell you; write those things you wish you have achieved, those things you want to achieve. I want you to work towards it and achieve it. Compare and contrast in the future and I hope you smile while doing it. I hope you become really happy and excited about your achievement. I believe so much in you. Make a positive change in your world. Irrespective of your gender, age, background you can make it.

A young boy was asked how many boys do you see in this fairy tale movie. He replied his father and said 'No boy'. His father asked him 'What does this tell you?' The boy replied 'That I can be the first boy'. Sometimes in life we can't find someone like us but this shouldn't stand as a barrier but as an uplift to whatever we want to be. We can always be the first to start that thing. That's what makes us unique. This is an outpour of my mind and my wide thoughts. I wish you best of luck love. Remember to always smile be happy and make the best out of life.


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